Last Night Might Have Been The Most Oilers Game Of The Season

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How Oilerz did the Oilers go last night? Well as many as six AHLers were playing, they blew a 3-0 lead, Alex Semin scored from his fucking back and Elias Lindholm had five points. Elias Lindholm. Guy had 27 points in 62 games before he played the Oilers. Our back six yesterday featured Keith Aulie and Jordan Oesterle as a pair. It’s not a longshot to assume that’s the worst defense pair in the history of the league. Of course, maybe if Dick Bachman attempted to make one save in the second half we wouldn’t have been torched for a touchdown by the 27th best team in the league but hey who knows.

Speaking of being awful, that loss virtually guarantees the Oilers will finish in the bottom three this year. Toronto and Carolina – who sit tied for 26th and 27th – are both ten points up on the 29th place Oil. The Coyotes only sit two points ahead of us for 28th. It’d be puzzling to wonder how they went 5-0 against us this year if not for the fact that it’s the Oilers and nothing they do is puzzling anymore. If I woke up one day and they said Rexall Place – an inextinguishable concrete slab – burnt to the ground because their 1960s-something scoreboard blew up I wouldn’t be surprised. Just don’t send our goalies there to put the fire out because they can’t save shit.

The good news is McJesus extended his point streak last night to a modest 27 games, and now has 110 in 42 games. The bad news is we’ll still probably land Eichel because God hates me.

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