Return Of The King


Urban Dictionary defines Connor as: “Person with large penis.” Pray for Columbus.

The hype around this return is so huge Sportsnet’s made it nationally televised. Last vs. last, and everyone will still be watching. Our big swinging dick has returned to the lineup tonight to face the worst defensive team in the NHL on this spectacularly beautiful day in the City of Concrete. It could not be sunnier if we tried. Normally terrible news on Groundhog Day, but this time, it’s a sign. A sign that our saviour, who has risen from the ground and is ready to take out 32 games of frustration on the NHL, is going to drop a touchdown on the garbage hauling Blue Jackets. Because the North always remembers, and Connor is coming. He’s coming for the league, for Brandon Manning and for everybody who spit on us while he was down. It just so happens that the depressingly awful Blue Jackets are the first team in his way. The final 17 games in Jungle history begins tonight, and Connor’s back to make them count.


PS – Outrageously cocky move by Columbus to pin their murderous Oilers burn on Connor’s Day:

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Won’t be a good look after we beat them by 50.

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