That’s So Jungle: Patrik Stefan

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This is it. The final game in the history of the Concrete Jungle. This is the moment we’ve been counting down for a month, and it’s finally arrived. We’ve remembered it all: The derrick almost killing everybody, Smytty’s last game, Paul Lorieau’s anthem, and many (six) more. Today, we remember the mothership. The juggernaut of all things Jungle. This wasn’t insane. This was the literal definition of utter pandemonium. What we witnessed on this particular evening will be remembered for the rest of hockey. We’ll simply call this one: Patrik Stefan.

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To quote the former Oilers play-by-play man Peter Loubardias: CAN YOU!

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BELIEVE!

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WHAT WE!

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JUST SAW?!

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MADNESS! If I could describe the atmosphere in the Jungle that evening in one word, it would be ballistic. Literal chaos ensued. Nobody had any idea what the hell happened. It’s been nine years and I still have no idea what the hell happened that night. This was the most improbable thing I think any of us may have ever witnessed. I probably listened to Quinner’s call 1,000 times when I got home from this one. Best part was when he announced that Stefan blew it. I mean, my God Gary. What kind of idiot doesn’t score on a wide open breakaway with a completely empty cage? Yakupov is a miserably bad first overall pick but I guarantee you (kind of) he would launch that puck into an empty net. The worst part for Stefan’s life was that wasn’t even the most unbelievable thing to happen on that play. Hemsky going in SECONDS later and tying the game was – by far – the worst feeling Patty has had since his first six abysmal years with Atlanta. It was, simply, perfection*.

PS – Patrik Stefan is considered one of the biggest first overall busts of all time, by a landslide. In his first four seasons, Stefan had 113 points with Atlanta. In Yak’s first four seasons in Edmonton, he’s had 108. Drive to your nearest Petro and immediately drink the available gasoline.

 

*Well, almost, we actually still lost the game in a shootout, which in itself is pretty typical of Jungle Life the last decade.


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