The Final Four: Oilers @ Kings

Four games left. Four games. That’s it. We do have some business to take care of, however. Home ice is on the line. A division title is on the line. A Hart Trophy is on the line. An Art Ross is on the line. Lots left to play for. That begins tonight.

Oh, and by the way: It’s currently +a lot, the sun’s in full force, playoffs are six days away (!!!), and Oil flags are starting to appear on cars all around the city. The Olympics are overrated anyways, Edmonton. What an absolute hall of fame time to be alive.


Optional skate this morning but why mess with a good thing? From yesterday:

Looks like Slepy in for Matty Ice. Doubt we see Matty Vegas tonight as well, needs some healing time. The NHL’s third star of the week comeths in the cage for a shot at becoming the Oilers’ all time single season wins leader.

Tonight’s Opponent

The Angels Kings.

Why They Stink

I want to hate on them, I do. You and I both know how much joy and sentiment I get out of binge-hating every team in the league. But I’ve kind of liked LA these last few weeks. We’re 2-0 against the Kings, used them to clinch a playoff spot, Doughty made some good lols about how good Daddy is, and nobody hates Matt Tkachuk more than the Los Angeles hockey community at the moment. Christ. That’s all okay in my books.

Still, this will never get old:

And in a karmic twist of cruel fate, the Kings will now face Daddy 4-5 times per season for the next 20 years, or at least until the next realignment.

Why Their Fans Stink

Wait… did we just get compared to Kings fans?

This was from a Ducks fan who was at the Rog Mahal on Saturday. Apparently, Oilers fans were big fat meanies to a division rival fan at the reincarnated Jungle on a Saturday night… in a battle for first place.

Fine. We should have been more considerate for your loss. It’s not easy watching that bald-headed imbecile trip over his own feet and proceed to hand hockey’s hottest duo a free two-on-one. But bandwagon and Oilers fans are two things that should never be used in the same sentence. Ever. If Anaheim was as shit awful as we were the last 3,650 days they’d already be in Seattle. All we did during that unholy period of liquid shit hockey was sellout every game while el Daryl gradually increased ticket prices all over our loyal asses. We deemed Craig MacTavish adequate to run and operate a professional hockey team and still packed that old barn on a nightly basis while Dallas Eakins threw towels at players and drew up plays that only nobody would be able to understand.

And I mean, if you’re going to burn us in comparison to a fan base then at least make it someone who hasn’t sold out every game this season despite being painfully average and who had Petey Budaj starting games for the bulk of it (Anaheim’s in the bottom 10 again, just a hair above New Jersey). I’ll take being like this dad-rocking-hall-of-fame-sob all day any day thank you very much:


Meanwhile, in Orange County:

Christ lady. Figure out your burns.

Which King Sucks

I’ve been way too nice to this point. This is the part where I remind you how shitally abysmal Derek Forbort is at anything hockey-related.

The Roundup

Lot’s of out-of-town scoreboard watching tonight. Anaheim retook the Pacific Division lead on Sunday after beating the Flames, and the Ducks now host Calgary in the Pond this evening… much to @happykarmagirl’s delight:

We have a game in hand on Anaheim, but the Ducks now have a very realistic shot at becoming the first PAC team this year to reach the century plateau and the Sharks have a scrimmage against Utica. Meanwhile, the Oil head into a building where we’ve had literally no success in basically ever:

Yep. We’ve lost 10 straight at the Staples Center, picking up one out of a possible 20 points in the process. One win in our last 13 trips to the City of Angels. I know times have changed but Christ, that is one big pile of shit to look at. However, this isn’t:

God, those numbers send it to hard noon. He actually has a chance of being both the only player to hit 100 and 90 points this year lol ya okay goodnight NHL. Oh, and he’s one away from 30. Guess what he’s doing tonight.


He’s getting 30, and the Oil are getting point number 99, and win number 45 (!!!). Oil win 3-1, that’s about as boring of a prediction as you’ll ever see form me but dammit it’s LA. Connor gets three points, because why not.

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