Game Day Blog 4/82: Finally, We’re Playing Again

FINALLY!!

The wait is over, again. The Oil are back in action tonight for their fourth straight one-anthem game after an absurd scheduling glitch that gave them four consecutive days off in literally the second week of the regular season. Made absolutely no sense. But hey, at least Gary won’t shut down the league for any gang-banger Olympics bullshit this season. Wouldn’t want patriotism in hockey. Nothing says “four days worth of built up anticipation” like OTTAWA!!!

Tonight’s Opponent: Ottawa SenatorrrrrzZzzZzzzzzz

Their 2016-17 Season Record: 44-28-10, 98 points. As of today, the Sens are one of three remaining teams who haven’t lost in regulation. I have no idea how they keep doing this.

What do they have? Erik Karlsson is a generational gift from the gods. Fortunately, he won’t be playing tonight. Also, he didn’t play last night and they absolutely pile-drove Mike Smith and the Flames.

Look, I know I hammer Sens Nation for this preposterously inexcusable bullshit attendances. I know I make fun of the fact that they can’t sellout playoff games, and that about nine people in wheelchairs and walking devices showed up to save their franchise player. But the reality is, it’s not their fault. Nobody is born into being a Senators fan. Those who cheer for Ottawa do so because they chose to, out of what one must assume to be some spiteful, teenage angst against their Leafs/Habs supporting parents. Last year, the Senators — a 40+ win NHL team with one of the greatest defensemen possibly ever to play the sport of hockey — averaged a whopping 87.4% capacity for home games. In contrast, the REDBLACKS — a CFL team that willingly spells their name like a rage-shitting troll from World of Warcraft — averaged 100.7%. Truthfully, I want to believe that the people of Ottawa care. I don’t think their grisly attendance charts are an adequate indicator of how the fans truly feel about this organization. Rather, I honestly believe the people from Ottawa simply refuse to make the pilgrimage out to Kanata to watch their mediocre ass hockey team protect a 1-0 lead for 56 straight minutes against Philly. These are the attendance figures you deserve when you build your arena in a suburban hellscape:

What’s better? Their solution to this madness was to go full Jacksonville Jaguars on us!

Tarps!! They put TARPS over seats because nobody wants to go!! I already envision Vancouver frantically taking a bunch of mental notes.

What do we have? No Leon.

Fuck.

Ya that’s a pretty big bummer, if true. Quick, trade Nuge because the guy can’t battle, is soft, and doesn’t throw hits *sniffs butt*. Who needs center depth?! This is why, people. Because you’re never as unimaginably healthy as the Oilers were last year. And I really don’t want to be trade molested by the Islanders for a third straight year.

Anyways.

It was an optional skate for the fellas this am, so here’s what we know:

Looks like Matty Benning picked up a case of Playing-With-Russellitis. Has Matthew played his best hockey in the first three games? No, definitely not, and he’s the first to admit it. But has his $16 million, no-trade possessing tire fire of a defenseman made his life any easier? Oh Christ no. Hard no. I am shitting in my pants thinking about a Nurse-Russell pair tonight.

These were the line rushes as of yesterday (optional skate this morning). How in the world is Chris Kelly still here?! We’re for sure signing him, aren’t we? Oh god. Tony drops down which means Kassian has been elevated to the 2nd line. I love the guy but man, holy shit. Our RW depth is definitely as advertised when this is happening on October 14th. If Ryan Strome could do ANYTHING productive tonight I think we’d all be stunned. Iceman starts in goal. Let’s go.

Oh, and I’m 1-0 when I attend games this year, so naturally, needing a W, I’ll be in attendance for this one. You’re welcome, Edmonton.

Did you know? If you combine the points from Ebs, Hall, and Yak (11) that’s more than the points from every player on our team not named Connor McDavid (10). We traded Jordan Eberle (2 points), Taylor Hall (4 points), and Nail Yakupov (5 points) for Ryan Strome (0 points), Adam Larsson (0 points), and Stuart Skinner (Christ).

Prediction: Who cares? With me in attendance tonight? We. Will. Win. Back up to five-hundo we go. Oilers win 4-2.

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