Mini Game Day Blog 30/82: NEED Two Straight, Oilers @ Leafs

No Morning After Blog today because I will not lie, I am in a WORLD of hurt fam. Celebrated that big win extra hard last night and I don’t even wanna write one blog today, never mind two. But I got you guys anyways. The boys are looking to grab four points in two nights against the team that scored four plus Kris Russell’s one-timer on us not too long ago.

I’ll reiterate, I feel like HELL.

Tonight’s Opponent: Toronto Maple Leafs (sic)

What do they have? Toronto is enjoying their best season in what feels like 100 years, and nobody deserves that less than them. This team, this organization, their media. It’s a gigantic cesspit. I will throw up in my mouth if they win anything this year. You guys fat-shamed Phil Kessel out of town and he won back-to-back Cups. I hope you don’t win a Cup for another 50 years, you assholes.

Yes, the Leafs (sic) celebrated their 50th anniversary of their last Cup win back in May. What a 50 years it has been. Let’s look at what’s happened after the last time the Leafs won the Stanley Cup:

  • We’ve elected two Trudeau’s as Prime Minister.
  • 10 different Star Wars movies have premiered, including the first one.
  • Watergate
  • The Sears Tower was built in Chicago
  • The Cubs won a World Series
  • Elvis died
  • Bobby Orr won the Calder Trophy
  • The Ramones began playing, and now they’re all dead
  • Disney World opened
  • We went to the goddamn moon
  • We built Northlands Coliseum

Shoutout to TFC for finally bringing the city a championship. Couldn’t have come at a better time considering the Yankees are going to streamroll the AL East for about a decade and the Raptors are a perennial lock to lose to the Cavaliers in the second round. Not to mention the Leafs will inevitably let the entire Six down for the entirety of Auston Matthews career.

Fuck Nazem Kadri with one of the sinks that Dave Staples pissed in.

What do we have? Ohhhh baby, last night was fun to watch. This has been the problem with the Oil. We’ll play like goddamn idiots and then follow the game up with an impressive win where all lines click and the goalie plays like Terry Sawchuk, then follow that up with another rug dump. They’ve humiliated my ability to believe. They crush the soul out of my body over and over again to the point where I don’t know if I can physically handle it anymore, and then they crush the wheels off of someone and I re-begin to plan the playoff parade. I still don’t know why I do this to myself. Love is a helluva thing.

Anyways this is all we’re getting from the coach:

Okay, cool. I’m assuming Walker is coming out because I’ll be honest, I don’t remember him playing last night. Todd’s boy Drake will likely come in because God actually fucking forbid we get Tony back into the lineup.

Did you know? Connor needed those two points to roll back into the top 10 in scoring. He’s now two back of last year’s Lady Byng winner, and is currently enjoying a nice little four game point streak. There have only been seven games this year where Connor has failed to register a point. Seven out of 29 games. Hahaha. My goddamn captain.

Prediction: Seriously, it’s games like last night that draw me right back in. My emotions are all over the map with team. It’s easily the most unhealthy relationship I’ve ever had in my life. Do not break my hearts tonight, boys. I believe in you.

Toronto is playing a back-to-back as well so there’s no excuse except injuries and brutal officiating. Bring it tonight. Let’s fucking go. 5-3 Oilers, Jesse with two. Connor with three.