Morning After Blog: We’re Officially Streaking

Something about last night’s game felt spectacular. It had “playoff vibes” written all over it. Don’t look now, but the Edmonton Oilers have won three straight games. We’re now one point back of the plummeting Vancouver Canucks, five points back of Calgary, and six points back of San Jose for third. We’re torching the West, we’re even better against specifically the Pacific. We’re back in a BIG way, baby. Had to sneak that picture of good St. Albert kid Colton Parayko. Just looking up and the industrial-sized scoreboard and/or God while the boys celebrate directly in his face.

1st Period

We had one shot on a four minute power play and actually St. Louis probably had the best scoring chance on it. But the Iceman was on his game last night. Here is Paul Stastny, who makes $1.3 trillion per year despite never eclipsing 50 points with the Blues, being left all alone by a lethargically back-checking Adam Larsson:

Combination of “thank God for the Iceman” and “thank God that was Paul Stastny and not somebody good.”

Paul — a pending UFA — is, unsurprisingly, having his best season in four years. Someone really stupid will pay this man on July 1, 2018. I pray to everything that someone isn’t us.

We hit two posts, increasing our league-wide lead in that category to about one million.


2nd Period

Again, no goals. Not a lot of highlights. This was bananaland though:

Literally makes sense why he’s making witchcraft with the puck this year. Definitely can’t trade Nuge now knowing firsthand that his stick is practically the fucking broom from Bewitched.

The Iceman comethed again.

We hit a few more posts.


3rd Period

Flashback to the 90s:

Now let’s go back to yesterday:


OKAAAAAAAAY. So many shades of Cujo out there. Same net too I’m pretty sure. First of all, suck it all the way again, Paul Stastny. You’re a BUM. That was possibly the best fuck up I’ve ever watched. Like we blew it. Everyone blew it. AND THEN WE DIDN’T BLOW IT because Cam is a netminding God who is destined to make all the saves and might never give up another goal again and then we gave up a goal like right after anyways:

Ready for this dickhead’s name. Tage (!!!!) Thompson scored his first NHL goal. You have to be some kind of asshole to willingly name your son “Tage.” Paul Stastny picked up an assist, because of course he did. Parayko also grabbed an assist. St. Albert forever.

However, it took us literally 38 seconds to get it back:

First, Kass nearly got us on the board but of course it didn’t go in because that’s the way shit was going. And the Michael Cammalleri, who Todd so boldly dressed instead of Tony Time, just fired the puck on net, and good things happen when you put it on net. We finally beat Jake Allen, and the floodgates (sort of) opened.

Three minutes after Patty Berglund got the Blues back on top, it was some 2016-17 magic that brought the boys back to life. Cue the McMusic:

Vince Dunn was left on a goddamn clothes hanger because good St. Albert kid Colton Parayko pinched with McDavid on the ice (mistake). That’s Connor’s 13th goal and only his second in the month of December, and god did we ever need that. Leon’s 18th assist and Lucic’s 17th assist. And just when we thought we were headed for over time, the Edmonton Oilers officially came back:

And the building exploded. Game. Set. Caggiula.

3-2 Oilers, final.


For the first time all year, a three game winning streak dance party:

God yes.

That felt incredible.

If you knew anyone who was at the game chances are you saw at least one (if not two) of a Snapchat and/or an Instagram story. And if you did and you listened to the volume on those fuckers, you’d hear it… It, being the Mahal Maniacs making their first appearance since the second round against Anaheim. That crowd was LOUD. On a Thursday. Against the St. Louis goddamn Blues. Welcome back, Oilers.

Connor McDavid has the most elite celly game I’ve maybe ever watched:

Every time he gets into it I’m sent directly to midnight. It’s not even close. I walk around fully chubbed for about two or three hours after the game, without fail. Right in front of the Blues’ bench too. Take it, you idiots.

Beating a team that previously clobbered the goddamn shit out of us (twice) feels like a double win if we’re being honest.

Tage Thompson and his stupid dumb name and his absolute TURBO fuckboy haircut:

What’s the over/under on how many ‘You up?’ texts this dude sends at 2:30AM on weekends?

We’re undefeated since Sekera has returned.

We’ve won five of our last seven.

Cam’s won six straight and he’s probably never going to lose again. We’ll see LB in March.

Zack Kassian is something special:

Might be the only face that rivals Jesse.


Drake Caggiula, surprisingly, for absolutely steamrolling somebody in the third. Normally I’d get that gif but honestly I was STUNNED that the Drake knocked somebody into orbit.


Could go to a lot of different people but I’m going back-to-back games with the man, the legend, the longest serving Edmonton Oiler… Mr. Ryan Nugent-Hopkins. What a damn year, little buddy.