Draft Preview: Wants and Don’t Wants, Plus Exploring the Katz Rumors

It’s draft day!

And CHRIST am I ever scared. Draft day is the perfect opportunity for the Oilers to completely mishandle at least one organizational asset. That’s Peter’s music!

Let’s quickly take a trip down memory lane:

  • In 2015, the Oilers traded the 15th and 31st picks in the Draft for some blue line help.
  • In 2016, the Oilers traded Taylor Hall for some blue line help.
  • In 2017, the Oilers re-signed Kris Russell for some blue line help.

In 2018, almost three years to the day of the famous Griffin Reinhart debacle, the Edmonton Oilers are actively shopping yet another high asset to hopefully acquire a defenseman that they haven’t acquired with any of the other assets they’ve previously shipped out. Not to mention the fact that this team already has $19.73 million allocated to five NHL defenseman, and Darnell Nurse is waiting on our GM to just literally hand him an expensive contract with long term and a no movement clause. After we inevitably acquire like Alex Goligoski or Johnny Boychuk or fucking Jonathan Ericsson for the 10th pick tonight just head right to the Crown and Tower at 11 Bellerose Drive in St. Albert. I’ll be passed out on the pool table.

If by some goddamn miracle the Oilers hold onto the 10th pick tonight, I would like — in order — Evan Bouchard/Quinn Hughes/Noah Dobson (if any of them are there this is automatic), Adam Boqvist, Grigori Denisenko, Oliver Wahlstrom. I do not want Ty Smith, Barrett Hayton, Serron Noel.

My ideal top 10:

  1. Rasmus Dahlin
  2. Andrei Svechnikov
  3. Jesperi Kotkaniemi
  4. Brady Tkachuk
  5. Filip Zadina
  6. Quinn Hughes
  7. Noah Dobson
  8. Barrett Hayton
  9. Oliver Wahlstrom
  10. Evan Bouchard

My “this would be good too” top 10:

  1. Rasmus Dahlin
  2. Andrei Svechnikov
  3. Jesperi Kotkaniemi
  4. Quinn Hughes
  5. Filip Zadina
  6. Noah Dobson
  7. Brady Tkachuk
  8. Oliver Wahlstrom
  9. Evan Bouchard
  10. Adam Boqvist

My “this will probably happen because God is woke and he hates my guts” top 10:

  1. Rasmus Dahlin
  2. Andrei Svechnikov
  3. Jesperi Kotkaniemi
  4. Quinn Hughes
  5. Filip Zadina
  6. Evan Bouchard
  7. Noah Dobson
  8. Brady Tkachuk
  9. Oliver Wahlstrom
  10. Ty Smith

Or, like I said, we trade the pick for a poor man’s Oscar Klefbom with more money and more term on his contract and with the belief that he will be our power play god but he stinks and it blows up in our face.


In non draft related news, word on the streets is that Mr. Daryl Katz is trying to “recover cash” even though he just bought the most expensive house in Los Angeles and allegedly offers financial compensation for things that news outlets in Edmonton have been banned from speaking about.

If Daryl Katz is going cheap on us we are breathtakingly fucked. It makes the ridiculously stupid Gryba buyout make sense (he saves roughly $300K). I also begin to worry about what might happen next. There are Cam Talbot trade rumors, which is stupendously idiotic, but when added to the Katz becoming tight with his money, all of a sudden that rumor doesn’t feel too far off, and that’s horrifying. One would think that by trading Talbot the Oilers would at least attempt to take a goalie of equal or similar value in return, say, Scott Darling. You’d also hope that deal involves forcing Carolina to take the Looch contract given that Talbot is much more proven than Darling, but whatever. Not the point. The point is, what if Daryl does not want to burn Al Montoya’s $1.0625 million contract in the minors? What if signing Koskinen was Daryl’s way of saying, “let’s save some bucks in net and hope that our team can get by with two below average goaltenders!” which, when translated from Cheap Ass Rich Alleged Harasser Dickhead to English becomes, “fuck having Connor McDavid anyways we’re rolling Koskinen and Montoya and clearing Talbot’s contract!” It’s not entirely unbelievable. Rumors are circumventing about the Ice District maybe dropping a couple of its novelties (such as the movie theatre) to “create the most energy” for the plaza. Energy? The fuck? Know what creates energy? Winning goddamn hockey games, you incapable buffoon. If you wanted to save money, why in the actual name of serious fuck did you build that monstrosity of a suit that watches over all of Rogers Place and sticks out of the wall like it’s the goddamn Death Star, and has a private elevator that actually obstructs seating in the upper bowl? It takes a real life asshole to build something like that and then decide he doesn’t want to pay players any money. And does that kind of explain why Peter Chiarelli wasn’t fired? Todd McClellan? Bobby Nicks? I’ll pay $40 for his shitty burger if that means we make some rational organizational decisions. Lord knows I’ll pay whatever they end up charging for cold ones. But if he refuses to spend money, either by way of firing the incompetent staff he has so blindly approved of or by diverting good players with decent salaries because he refuses to pay them, then forget it. Forget buying jerseys, or apparel, or food, or drinks, or even tickets. We might as well be Ottawa. You can’t buy an LA mansion and have the city pay for most of your arena and expect us to believe that money is becoming a problem, you humungous idiot.

Draft’s at 5:30 tonight pray together fam godspeed.


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